Time for Courage and Commonsense. Seek Help Now!
Deciding to seek help in overcoming life's problems frequently requires considerable courage. The reasons for this reluctance are many and varied. Many people, especially
men, are taught to believe that asking for assistance is an indication of
personal failure or weakness. In many cases we simply believe that our
problems are simply too difficult and we lose hope for an effective solution.
Many individuals have lost trust in other people as a consequence of negative
experiences. Our fear in confronting personal demons may be considerable.
Reasons abound. It's easy to procrastinate. None of these reasons provide
an excuse for suffering in silence. Help, support and advice are often available.
Without doubt, the courageous and smart thing is to seek advice and help when it is available.
On some occasions seeking help is not a choice. It is a necessity. Sometimes our pain is so intense that we should not delay. Immediate and decisive action is required. How might we recognise such a situation? Some of the signs that we are no longer coping and require urgent assistance are listed below. It is preferable to seek out specific individual support at a local level in these situations. Consulting with your family doctor is probably the best place to start for most individuals. Feelings need to be fully and clearly communicated. The local telephone guide often has several useful crisis phone numbers in a special section. Problems including those listed below or other particular concerns need to be specifically discussed.
- Loss of interest in activities which usually provide enjoyment
- Increased irritability or anxiety
- Enduring feelings of self-blame, guilt or worthlessness
- Addiction to alcohol, drugs or gambling
- A believe that life is no longer worthwhile. (In severe cases, suicidal thoughts).
- Loss of appetite, weight or physical illness
Solving these problems can completely change our perspective. Life becomes worthwhile again. There can be simple plans, goals and dreams. We must however have the courage and strength to face up to our situation and to seek help. When our spirits are at their very lowest point we frequently become defeatist and lose hope. Never despair. Keep an open mind about the benefits of seeking support, help and advice. Almost certainly, you will be pleasantly surprised.
It is not just the severity of our emotional pain which prompts us to seek help. There are many specific circumstances where expert help assist us in real, practical ways. The benefit is often only appreciated with the benefit of hindsight. Physical health problems generally require a full and honest assessment by a doctor or other health professional. Many people find that relationship counseling allows them to appreciate their personal situation in an entirely new perspective. Advice for a wide range of legal problems is widely available.
Beating an addiction to substances or alcohol will almost always be easier with the help of professionals experienced in the area. Even a problem such as a personal debt crisis may have a practical solution if we make the effort. The hardest part is often the making the choice to seek advice and building a strong commitment to follow through on that decision. Seeking help indicates genuine commitment, commonsense and strength not a concession of weakness, defeat or failure. Take that bold first step.
Wishing you happiness and a new beginning!
By Doctor Andrew Rylatt (Medical Doctor)
21st March 2004
